I Needed Self Confidence For Where God Was Calling MeJan 25, 2023
Self-confidence is an essential ingredient for success. It is the belief in oneself and one's abilities, which allows you to take action, overcome obstacles, and achieve your goals. Unlike external validation, self-confidence comes from within and can be developed and strengthened with effort and awareness. You can have the feeling of self-confidence without proof of success. Self-confidence is believing in yourself to find solutions and moving forward no matter what life throws at you.
There are many areas of my life that I feel confident in my abilities to be successful. For example, I feel confident as a mom, a wife, a Christian, a friend and as a teacher. This confidence comes from years of taking action over and over again. You can probably think of areas of your life where you feel confident.
For 26 years, I was comfortable and successful as a teacher and ministry leader in a church and school. I knew the community. I knew how to handle issues or problems when they came up. I knew how to navigate relationships with leadership and in the different cultural groups. I knew how to be efficient in handling the day to day tasks of my job. I was confident in my abilities to do my job well.
Then God led me in an unfamiliar direction. He called me to leave the church and school to serve in a different capacity as a Catholic Life Coach. Not only was I leaving a community that I loved, but I was also leaving behind the confidence that I had established over the years by doing my job day after day. I was facing a new career and ministry with lots of uncertainty about how it would look and which step I should take next.
At first, I thought I needed a "magic pill" so I could have self-confidence, but I quickly learned that I could create the self-confidence that I needed to take this giant leap of faith. I learned that self-confidence is a feeling and that all feelings are generated within. My thoughts or beliefs create the feeling of self-confidence, but they also create the feelings of overwhelm, doubt and fear.
Not only did I begin coaching other women, I began a daily practice of self-coaching. I made time each day to quietly reflect on the thoughts and beliefs bouncing around in my mind. Like Second Corinthians encourages, I took each thought captive. I wrote my thoughts on paper and examined them to see which feeling they created. I then decided if I liked how the thought felt or if I wanted to exchange it for a different thought. This allowed me to create thoughts that led to the feeling of self-confidence. It also allowed me to see what prevented me from feeling self-confidence in my new calling.
Here are three common blocks to self-confidence that can hold you back from reaching your potential.
- Shame is the feeling that there is something wrong with you, and it often stems from a core belief that you are not good enough. Shame makes you want to hide and can block self-confidence. To overcome shame, it is essential to remember that your worth is not determined by what you do or don't do, but because you are a child of God. This realization can release the shame and allow you to create self-confidence based on the belief in yourself as worthy, loved, and needed in this world.
- Resistance is when you push against reality and believe things should be different. It creates tension and can shut down your ability to deal with the present moment. To overcome resistance, it is crucial to accept your reality, be clear on your situation, and take action from a place of self-awareness and self-compassion. These allow you to view life through the lens of finding solutions to obstacles. It creates self-confidence when you believe that you can overcome whatever comes your way.
- Comparison, or "compare and despair," can quickly block self-confidence as you compare your worst to others' best. To overcome this block, it is essential to shift your thoughts and focus on what is possible for you. Instead of comparing yourself to others, look to them as inspiration and as an example of what is possible in your life.
In conclusion, self-confidence is the key to success and can be developed and strengthened with your efforts and focused awareness. By overcoming the blocks of shame, resistance, and comparison, you can create self-confidence and reach your full potential. It is through self-confidence that you will be courageous enough to follow where God is calling you!
Jennie is a Catholic Life Coach, Podcaster, Speaker and founder of Catholic Moms in the Middle. She equips and encourages middle-life moms to reconnect in their faith by breaking spiritual strongholds so they can finally lose the weight they've struggled with for years, to reconnect in their marriage and to discover where God is calling them in this new season of life.